2020 has been a rollercoaster year and we’re not out of the woods yet. So what happens when we reach exhaustion and start to experience burnout? This is one owner’s story and the steps she took to overcome it.
Burnout In The Hospitality Sector
Burnout can happen to anyone, especially if they have been under a prolonged amount of stress, as many of us have this year. The most common burnout symptoms are:
- Lack of energy.
- Constant fatigue.
- Sleep disorders.
- Reduced performance.
- Concentration and memory problems.
- Inability to make decisions.
- Reduced initiative and imagination.
Today’s episode is brought to you by The Start Up And Grow Club, which offers an accelerator program for those who want to set up their unique holiday rental or glamping businesses quickly. It also offer a supportive community to help members wherever they are in their business journey.
Additional Resources And Links Mentioned
- The previous episode with Kerry Roy at the beginning of her journey of setting up a new glamping business in Italy. Episode 12
- Circle of Desire Glamping, Italy
- Pomodoro technique
- Saffron Research Paper
- Contact Sarah Riley through Inspired Courses
- The Ultimate Glamping Business Guide
- Guest Booking Success Marketing Masterclass
- The Glamping Business Facebook Group (+ Unique Holiday Rentals)
- Tools and resources in the Inspired Courses VIP Lounge
- How To Start A Glamping Business
Listen to the podcast here:
- iTunes (Apple)
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- Libsyn (App for smartphones)
- Spotify (Smart Player)
- Soundcloud (Smart Player)
Want To Feature On The Business Of Glamping And Unique Holiday Rentals Podcast?
If you have something inspiring to offer the world of Glamping and Unique Holiday Rentals then get in touch with Sarah Riley and share it on the Podcast. For more information contact Sarah here.
Listen to previous episodes here:
Sarah Riley : 2020 has been a tricky year for many, and we’re not out of the woods yet. So what happens when we reach an exhaustion point and start to experience burnout, this is one owner story and the steps she took to reenergize herself and come back fighting. Welcome to episode 35 glamping and unique holiday rentals are surging in popularity with the growing desire of customers to book holidays that deliver inexperience. They are also the new business of choice for those wanting to improve their work-life balance. So how do you build a strong business like this that gives you the life you need and a great investment? I’m Sarah Riley. And I want to share what I’ve discovered after being immersed in this industry for over 20 years, to inspire you to find out more about what’s going on. Welcome. This is the business of glamping and unique holiday rentals.
Sarah Riley : Hello, and thank you so much for joining me today. Now this is quite a big topic, but you know, burnout can happen to anyone, especially if they’ve been under a prolonged amount of stress. As many of us have been this year now, just in case you don’t know what burnout is. The most common burnout symptoms are feeling exhausted, a lack of energy, constant fatigue, sleep disorders, reduced performance, concentration, and memory problems, and an inability to make decisions, but also you have a reduced initiative and imagination. So you’re able to kind of make those imaginative creative decisions that you might have been able to before it can happen to anyone. And it is basically a summary or conclusion of lots of things happening as we have seen this year. And sometimes it’s not so easy to shrug those off and to move on. And especially if we’re not able to do the things that we might normally be able to do such as exercise whenever we want or see our friends and go and hang out in a cafe and just unwind in those ways that we like to do.
Sarah Riley : But also if we’ve had the added stresses of a new business, maybe building a new business, or just trying to keep the one you already have going strong, and then you’ve got the issues of feeling a bit stressed about your family and are they safe And what about school and education Just all of these questions that we’ve been having this year, not just within our family, but yeah, our extended our aging parents and their aging parents. And, you know, the list goes on. There’s plenty of reasons why we’re all suffering a bit this year and it can happen to anybody that things can actually get better a little bit more serious. So this is why I felt it was really important to share this story from Kerry who was really kind to actually be very open with me and to share her story on the podcast about what she went through.
Sarah Riley : Now, Kerry is an amazing businesswoman and entrepreneur. She has two glamping sites. One glamping site is in the UK in Yorkshire, and she also has another, which she has just recently set up and it’s had its first season in probably one of the most difficult seasons we’ve ever had in this industry over in Italy, which is where she’s based. And, you know, she, unfortunately, had a situation and experience that happened as a result of all the stress that she’d been under. So Kerry has been on the show before. She very kindly shared her story of why she decided to move to Italy, to set up a new glamping site there when she already had a very successful one in the UK and the whole motivation behind that. And it’s a very inspiring story. And since then we have obviously had COVID hit and everything else that happened to the hospitality industry.
Sarah Riley : So this is why she was so willing to come back and share how she dealt with her own burnout experience. Now, in this interview, I do actually share a little remedy that I have a little stress-relieving drink that I swear by. And I share so many times with friends and family and I call it my golden tea and it really is the most satisfying and just uplifting tea that you can have maize out a great deal of, ingredients, which actually each one of them has its own special quality. And I’m going to share the recipe with you at the end of this episode. So please hang on until the end. This episode actually has been sponsored by the startup and grow club, which offers an accelerator program and a support group for those who want to set up their own unique holiday rental and glamping business.
Sarah Riley : The reason that it’s important to do this together as a group is to actually have a support system because it’s vital. When you find yourself with questions on a daily basis, when you’re going through your own specific journey to setting up a business, those questions come up throughout that process, not just at the beginning, not in the Midland or the end, but throughout. So having a club, a group of like-minded people you can to, to speak about your specific issues, get the answers you need and the support you need, and then even request training on specific issues that you need extra help with is just priceless. And that’s why this club has been set up to help share the burden and relieve the pressure of whatever is happening for you. You know, we rise by lifting others, but at times we need lifting too. So if this may help you, if this club may help you, you can find out more by going to inspired courses.com forward slash club.
Sarah Riley : So without any further ado, I’m going to introduce you to Kerry Roy. I hope you enjoy this interview and do please stay on till the end. And I’ll share with you my recipe for the golden tea. So Kerry, thank you so much for joining me. you have had a few experiences recently, which you, we talked about and we’ve talked about collectively as a group and in the industry and, you know, amongst friends and so on. And, and really I reached out to you because I thought that actually you have an awful lot to share and you can really help people that may be going through a similar situation. And so first of all, tell me a little bit about your experience and what happened.
Kerry Roy : Okay. So I, I realize now looking back that, you know, I’m very driven and I, and I, I find it hard to say no to opportunities and I just have that fire in my belly to keep going. And especially in this industry, the glamping industry is a growing industry. So it feels like there’s a lot of opportunities and different paths within the industry to grab. and, I have a glamping site in Yorkshire, which I’ve had for nine years. And then I came over to Italy a few years ago to sell per second glamping site in a country where I knew no language at the time. I knew nobody and I have managed to break that barrier and finally set up this beautiful, small little Oasis. However, it didn’t feel like in a way it’s this to me for, for a while because it, everything, everything just felt clouded.
Kerry Roy : And, and I realize now I was so in a state of overwhelm and that, that I, I didn’t, I couldn’t see things clearly for what there were. I was always in very much a, it’s like running on adrenaline. The only way I can say is that I think for many years in business, I realize I run on this acute stress and adrenaline that became the norm for me. And it did. So I didn’t know how to bait anything, although I, you know, I’d always be snappy around certain loved ones, especially those closest to me, like my father and a partner. I would, they would get the blunt end of the stick. I’d be, just frustrated, emotional, angry, but all I kept saying is it’s it, this is meant to be like this because I, I’m trying to set up a new business and I’ve got two businesses and this is how it is.
Kerry Roy : This is how it is to be an entrepreneur. So just accept it and get on with them until my body literally told me to stop and my body shut down on me. And, and it was at that point where I knew I had pushed myself physically and mentally to an extreme that I didn’t realize that my body could actually deal with that. I didn’t realize my mind and my body could say, just stop, stop stacking, and just put the brakes on. and it was a big way cooker. So it was, about a year ago, last January, I was driving back from the UK. And again, we spoke earlier about, you know, not always being present in the moment, whatever I was doing, my mind was always in business mode or it was focusing about everything else I’ve got that never-ending task list.
Kerry Roy : And we all have that never-ending task placed in business because that is, that is business and that’s entrepreneurship. But I would always try to think that I could get this whole task list down and, you know, maybe I have 20 things on that task list to do in one day. And one of them was driving her back, for many weeks running up to it. Again, I was only snappy emotional. I was getting a lot of tingles in my veins and my body. And I started to shake that if this was just a few weeks prior notice I was getting so worked up that I was, I was tremoring. And I just thought, this is again, it’s just the norm because I’m fading a bit stressed. And then in the car was on a mountain pass. And all of a sudden this huge amount of emotion just came a radar, came me and I was driving and I was shaking and I literally had this massive meltdown.
Kerry Roy : And I don’t know if it was a near breakdown or a panic attack because I’ve never suffered from panic attacks before. And I couldn’t drive. We had to pull up, thankfully my boyfriend, Elizabeth May and the, he just, what, what the hell was going on That everything my, my speech stopped. I was absolutely erratic. Every time he came near me or anyone, the paramedics came near me. I was just shouting like a monster invasion. And it was strange. It was, I come to announce by the experiments and my body was just tremoring and, and was just curling up into a ball. And I was screaming. Like I remember screaming well trying to scream cause my mind was screaming. And my boyfriend tried to get me to drive, to drive to the hospital, but the car wouldn’t start. So we’ll come back to this quiet comical in the cow. And I remember I was trying to speak and all that because… Nothing would come out. So the ambulance came and I was in the hospital just for the evening and they gave me what it was too. I can’t remember what the game is, but something just to calm everything. And they said to me, have you been under a lot of stress lately And I said, well, yeah. And it was, it was the buildup of, of the stress. And, and after that, it was the strangest feeling. the only time I’ve felt so clear-minded was after I did my six weeks training in yoga course a couple of years ago. And I came away from that with a whole new clear mindset perspective online. And after that, it almost like, it just felt like it cleansed me and it just got rid of it all. and I knew then I had to have to change the, my, my situation because that was my body saying you’ve pushed it too much.
Kerry Roy : And then I have to stop stacking and stacking the pressure. because if you don’t, you will I’m since then a fragile kind of Alliance. We’ve spoken to the people who have opened up about their, situations similar and the amount of he’d pull the, suffering from diabetes or the suffering just from general depression or they’ve ended up with, Parkinson’s no long guy that literally ended up in a wheelchair. He was a successful businessman and has everything going for him, traveled the Wells, anyone on the outside would just stay in the aid to start this amazing entrepreneurial spirit and this amazing lifestyle by the time in this 55 is now is, is disabled because he, and apparently that was stress that stress put him into, a math teacher. And now he has to go round with an electric motor and looking back, he says, he wishes, he took us into his body when it, when it went a long time before, but he didn’t, he kept doing it and he kept going.
Kerry Roy : And I think that’s the, that’s the problem is, do we listen to it and actually change it Or do we change it for a period of time that then being that entrepreneurial spirit, do we then go back into old habits again And then that’s when it affects you in the long run. And for me, that’s a scary, scary thought. And as you know, Oh, you’ve been, you’ve been there yourself before and you’ve, you’ve had that with your health and that literally, you know, through, through your world of power and it’s, is it worth it, then you ask yourself, is it all worth it Is it really with putting ourselves on this pressure Not just ourselves, close forms, our loved ones around us who we’ve become horrible to we’ve become editable from the best of myself. I’ve become the worst. the worst person it’s like, you know, there’s two sides.
Kerry Roy : So it’s, yeah, I still ask myself now. And that’s why at the moment, I’m very much in the situation of businesses doing well. Thankfully it’s all kind of been worth it, but I know I have to, and I really am trying hard. It’s like taking the kid to a sweet shop who wants all this week’s tears and they’re, and they’re not allowed. So they’re like, no, I’ve got to not eat them. And I’m having to say, for me, it’s hard to slow down. It’s hard to step back, then just run with it and keep stacking. and I find that really hard to be stale
Sarah Riley : As everything that you’re saying there really, I resonate with totally because that, even when you were mentioning about the tingling through the fingers, that’s like energy and adrenaline surging through your body at certain times, and that’s kind of linked to adrenal fatigue and all that kind of thing. And the whole shiny object syndrome where you just can’t say no to that shiny object. And in the description of it’s like going in a sweet shop and not being able to say no to that sweet it’s exactly that taking that step back is really, really hard, but it’s fantastic that you listened to your body and you were given a big sign that you needed to listen and you know, it could’ve been, I’m assuming incredibly scary. but the other thing that you were saying that you know, it was stressed, that was your diagnosis. It was stress. It was a buildup of too much stress. And we all I think are under immense stress at the moment because the current situation, but so many of us don’t really take the words, stress or the implications of tumor’s stress. Very seriously. It’s almost like it’s been bred into us that actually stress is just something you can overcome. And stress is just something you need to maybe just take things less seriously. Do you find that as well Or do you take a bit more seriously now Yeah, I do.
Kerry Roy : No, I do take it more serious now and I think what I’ve learned and because I’ve done a lot and thankfully I have to do my yoga and we wanted to create wellness retreats, which is part of my business plan is I have started to lead into more women and from friends that are therapists, I’ve learned a lot from them of what is the difference in stress and acute stress, which is that acute stress is more of a, an underlying stress is building up. And those, you know, Penn is back with you for a longer period of time. And then we have that stress where, you know, if it’s an event that just happens like now there’s a lot more people that are stressed because they lose in jobs. They can’t see the family, people are ill and some people are dying. So that, that becomes a more temporary stress.
Kerry Roy : And at the time it probably emotionally is a lot bigger and, and you might rage with it or cry how everybody deals with things in a different way. But the acute stress is it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s a longer, longer one. I keep stressed. Then I didn’t in all the things of emotions. And, and I think for myself as well, as, you know, because of the separation I’ve gone through as well, I was, I didn’t deal with my emotions because I literally threw myself into creating and developing a business that it was blocking out and suppressed in any of the underlying emotions or personal emotions. And then that all comes to a head and, and, and then I’m not sweat and that’s when it’s dangerous, dangerous for body, because it’s dangerous for the body and the mind. And yeah, there’s, there’s definitely, you know, I know some people will say that, in part, so one of the guys yesterday, who owned the restaurant who owned the restaurant, they S they, they need a bit of stress and some people do feel that we need to go stress to keep you on your tippy-toes.
Kerry Roy : And I think stress does come to all of us. It’s a natural thing. And we all deal with different ways, but yes, I can’t stress is something that you feel isn’t that, and it’s not a stress. You think you’re dealing with it, then actually you’re not dealing with it. And, and it’s not until you’re until you may be like, have the therapy, which I have to ask some type of pain it’s not until then that I can look back clearer, with, you know, clever glasses on and say, actually, God, ya know, right. Actually, I can see now looking back, I could see it come in and I could sit back at the time I could image it because I’ve just become immune to it. I came you to live in as an acute stress person.
Sarah Riley : Yeah. And forgetting what it used to be like. And I think you’re right there that you have real moments of positive stress, which I think is a good thing because that gets you fired up. It gets you excited. It gets, you know, you’re working hard or whatever for the moment, whatever you’re doing. So I find that when I’m speaking, speaking on stage, I have positive stress because it gets me really excited. It brings up my energy and, you know, and then I do a better job speaking on stage. But then there is that, as you said, that, cause that’s over quickly is it’s, you know, moments that will come and go that acute stress, the negative stress is building up over a period of time. That really gets to the point where it fills you to the brim and you can’t take anymore.
Sarah Riley : But it’s, I find it really interesting as well to think of it in terms of energy. So I have this huge thing about energy. I feel that we are all energetic beings connected to an energetic world. And if you look into the deepest cell in our body, it’s all made up of energies, just energy and stress and emotion can be a positive energy or a very, very negative energy. And so what you probably were doing was just building this negative energy inside you and your body couldn’t cope with any more negativity and negative energy can actually bring illness and disease. And so that’s what it was saying. I need to get this out. and so that is a really good thing that you have by experience, even though it would have, would have been dry, unpleasant. it just allows you allowed you to take a different path. And so what are you now doing to overcome it How are you, how are you focusing on getting
Kerry Roy : So while I, it took me a good, because again, I saw if I just had a wake-up call and then I was still in the business, excuse me, I didn’t finish developments that were kind of just threw myself into it, but trying to be a little bit more aware of these feelings in the tingles and not allowing myself to get back to that. and then I, but I was still very, very snappy and overwhelmed and frustrated and very teary as a day of criterion. And, you know, I just felt like I just look back at my week and I’d think, well, I’ve done this week. I’ve not stopped. I have not stopped, but I could not define and tell you what done, because it was just all clouded by the end of that year, last year I opened the business lending, but what I found is I couldn’t, I couldn’t do, I was procrastinating all the time.
Kerry Roy : I felt like I, that was an inspiring and interfering Gail and I wasn’t where they have been a business person. I was starting to doubt myself in business because I seem to be avoiding doing all the important tasks. And I found that quite a few occasions, you know, say we’ve always got things to do as I open my laptop. And I just say another thing, I don’t know where to stop. I didn’t know how to start. And so I had this block for many weeks. It was just blocked. And I realized I wasn’t getting anything important, done because of this. And I needed help. I had to get somehow. And, so I had some Sabbath pay, which was where it’s gray. And actually today, they don’t say a lot. And there’s the other little guidance that, and it is just very much, you just speak hen and letting it all out and having someone listen to you who doesn’t know, you doesn’t know anything about you, but is neutral because I think many people agree.
Kerry Roy : It’s difficult to speak with family and friends all the time. You don’t want to feel like you mound and you don’t put on them, or they just don’t understand. So to have someone for now week, I didn’t, we did it over a six week period. it, then you realize that you’re answering your own questions. So actually lost your talk here. You then saying things that come to mind and you go, Oh, actually, that’s why that, that’s what I need to be doing more. This is why I get like do so we know it, but it it’s. And yeah, so that works for me. And just a little bit of guidance on how to one of the big things actually was stop trying to do too much in one day. And again, for, for Jose always got, you know, that never in task less, she wants to try and get everything done.
Kerry Roy : And she called it the Pomodoro effect. And it was just a case of limiting yourself to four important tasks a day and then can use for my God. I need to get through like 10 or 15 in a day. But that is just, you know, what has you main main priorities What might you not get done And what’s the bits that might just keep passing on and passing on. And that actually to me, helped a lot just to go, do you know what Just do less, do less, but focus do less and do it right. Rather than trying to do everything and being what lab, what felt like being absolutely all over the place. And I had no focus. I had no focus because I was trying to be anti thing to everyone say, I wasn’t saying no, I was trying to do everything. and all you do then is you do snippets and pockets of this and pockets that, and you never feel like you get anything finished.
Kerry Roy : What do they call it Jack of all trades master of none. And that was exactly how I was, how I was functioning. and then Joe and locked down, a friend who was a therapist had recently trained up in hypnotism and he was adamant that he wanted to just try it. Cause he seen it. An inmate may not know in that he’d seen and can be quite scathing. And it was a bit all over. And he said, let me just do a session on you. And they was tingled because I will still get the tingles. And he did two sessions on may, just virtually. And I have to say there was tingles of gone, which is incredible. And there’s been a lot of moments is similar. I should have been feeling. I know I was waiting for him. I’ve had moments where I’m like strange I’ve and waiting for this adrenaline and all these tingles to return, but it hasn’t. So there was therapy’s helped and the neck is eaten as eating pot play because I found that if you’re rushing around and you start attacking the sugar, the sugar is the worst thing for your mood and having too much sugar. We are, we, and it’s so true is if you get your day, right, you can feel so much better. And, and having that energy, alone and just being a happier person and yeah, the right foods can make and actually sit in to eat and not just grabbing like wheat. Like again, we do.
Sarah Riley : And
Kerry Roy : Then also exercise which, to be faster. I’ve rarely been, I haven’t been, but when I do, I feel great. but yeah, an hour for me, I believe in need sanctuary space. There’s a create in some thing that is for you when you fade and like, and just being honest and saying, I just need time out like child, when a child gets up and they need time out, or five minutes is we all need to stop time out. And for me working and living, in the same place and having family and friends over and trying to accommodate your friends and family and work at the same time is, is a lot of pressure sometimes. And so I got my camper van and that is, that is my time out. I just get in and I go away from here to actually have time off because if I don’t, I just keep working. And then I find that that’s when I become a more stressy person, because I’m not giving myself a break, an actual break, even if it a day, one day, a week, two days or more. But that two days a week is so important to actually get away,
Sarah Riley : Especially when you, you live and work in the same place. So you will never having a break from your work and your stress and your pressure. So, yeah, absolutely. I totally agree with you that, do you think it’s people in this industry that are susceptible to it or do you think it’s entrepreneurs in general that are susceptible to it I think that
Kerry Roy : It’s definitely entrepreneurs in general. but I think they, the grump hospitality industry overall is, more susceptible because it is, you know, especially for open-end or even if it’s, it feels like a 24 seven role. So it’s all, they were not always servicing guests, you know, throughout the night or in a, for me, I just eat my dinner, I’ve got guests and then you’ve always waited for the doorbell to ring if they need something or want to ask you a question. So I feel that in hospitality, it’s not like you go and open your shop and then you close it at five, 6:00 PM and you can go home, even though you might have still work to do we with, I don’t mind doing work, but it’s when you know that you’ve got somebody who needs you at any time of the day and in hospitality, that is why it’s like, it’s because your guests if they need to find a light, you know, the forgotten something, you will always feel like you can’t just live your normal life.
Kerry Roy : and always go away from it because just in case somebody or something goes wrong in nature. So I think that puts a lot of pressure on us because we’re not barely, you don’t feel totally free, unless you stopped to help. And that for me, that, for me, it depends what people want. If you’re chasing the money, then try and do, you will do everything yourself. I say it. And you put the, see that even down to the laundry, the amount of people in the industry that do all the launch, laundry themselves, and then washing and drying and sticking on the line, then it’s raining and then you’ve got to own it. That for me, takes up so much time that I would rather lose 20 pounds a week and pass it on to a laundromat to do it. I’m not, I’m paying 20 pounds a week for my time to have a fan for me.
Kerry Roy : My time is more valuable than not 20 pounds a week. So because you can’t buy back time and if you can, not, time is balanced because all you do the way I see it is by doing that, I’m paying myself to be stressed by keeping up spending today and doing all of this extra work. I’m paying myself to become overwhelmed and stressed and busy. And so if, and you know, and I think when you feel it, when you feel it on top and you’re feeling focused and you’re feeling happier, you do think back to when your business will go in the better direction because you have chance to then that free space to actually work on it and not working in it all the time. And that’s the difference is if you want to grow your business, you need to work on it and you need to have that clear free space. If you just want to keep working in it and doing the same and feeling like you’re on the wheel, then it does become emotional and it will, it will be called down the bench. Yeah,
Sarah Riley : Absolutely. And I think as well, that you’re lucky that you are able to make those decisions for yourself. Some people who may be are in a partnership or a relationship, a marriage, and they’re running a business and one might have a decision difference, or, you know, they may or may not agree to what the other one has said. Say for example, you were saying about laundry and cleaning. So one may say, I need help with this. And the other one may say, no, it’s too expensive. We’ll just do it ourselves. And I think that it really is about saying, being strong in your decision and saying no, because I’ll be a better person. If I get help and I will be able to concentrate more on generating more income for the business, if I move this and delegate it somewhere else. And I think that’s a really, really good piece of advice.
Sarah Riley : You’ve just given them. And, certainly from my perspective, I was taught something. I have a lovely lady who helps me, Emma, Emma, who helps me with my podcast. So just in case you’re listening, Emma and Emma, she does this fantastic thing that taught me a lesson. She said, these are my working hours. If you try to contact me outside of that, then you just won’t hear from me. And so you need to be prepared for that. And I think that was brilliant because I make myself too available to everybody all the time, every time, every hour. And sometimes, you know what you have to say, no, my doors shut. My shop is shut.
Kerry Roy : Yeah. And then, but it’s hard, isn’t it Because then people feel like, well, no that’s. And I think we have this thing is that maybe it’s a cultural thing, or it comes from a past tradition that, you know, in business, you’ve got to be working all hours and you’ve got to be available to everyone, but do you do it, do you really That, that, that spot, because we’ve been taught by that, or that’s why history says, because you can still run a successful business and where it can live. And like you say, have, you know, those, those lines that you don’t cross do to give you that freedom.
Sarah Riley : Absolutely. So even just to say, you know, after these hours, it’s emergencies only, and his, if you, if you’ve got any information you need, you’ve got any questions, here’s all the information. You can find it here. And so they know everything from there and they only contact you, out of hours when it’s an emergency. So it kind of takes the pressure off a little bit.
Kerry Roy : It does because it’s got to be boundaries. And I think that’s the same with, you know, think with staff as well as they need to respect your boundaries. And if you create that kind of culture, which I very much trying to say is I respect your time. If I really need help, how could you just be flexible But then I know that there’s sometimes I really need help, and I think, no, but that’s their day off. They worked really hard and can’t, I have to just get on with it because I don’t want, then, then they respect. I find that it works bank, that they know that when I’ve got my time off, they don’t contact me unless it’s an absolute emergency because I will come back about this. And, and, and, and that’s the thing and what managers who are in hospitality don’t want their husband or wife to be a better person. So I’m taking that laundry ship tab and you will have a glass of wine. I have to be alive. And the way I look on your death bed and I can go, okay, I I’m definitely going off credit and successful businesses. I’ve achieved what I wanted to thought. Did I actually do what I really want to out of my business life Did I achieve what I wanted to do for my soul And, I’m not SWAT. I think I’d have to myself on my death bed. And that’s why we’re trying to work by.
Sarah Riley : Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, totally. And as somebody who came a bit close to that once a time really does when your life flashes in front of your eyes, having those regrets, you know, you can’t take time back. So make the changes. Now, if the change needs to be made, there’s no point in waiting. So if you had a few tips that you could give someone who maybe has been listening to this, and they’ve been thinking, you know what, I’ve been getting those tingles, I’ve been feeling a little bit off. I think I’m taking it too seriously. And I’ve got too much stress in my life. What would you suggest to them could be really quick ways of maybe giving themselves a little bit of a release from those pressures.
Kerry Roy : I say, you know, if you’re a to speak to anybody, which I know some people are and they keep it all in closed is having read, read online about those symptoms that you have in, and you will see that there’s a pattern and, and, and it will start to open up the reasons what what’s creating it, do not be afraid to get therapy. I mean, I was having these emotions, Joe in a time where I literally was almost about to, all of the money I’d invested. I hadn’t opened, and I was nearly about to liquidate my business as well because of everything that had happened. And, and I thought I can’t afford therapy. I can’t afford it. And then I realized that that was the best money I spent, because that has brought me back to where I need to be.
Kerry Roy 2: So don’t, don’t look at therapy is just another expensive outgoing, it’s probably the best part of that money that you can spend on yourself when, when you paid in this pressure to correct. Yeah. and honestly, I mean, for me personally, I have, I’m not great at I, as in the TA is that I’m not doing it often, but when I have tried to do it often, and I know this is not something that a lot of people, can get into easily is meditation. It really does work. And I’ve always been quite a sort of a, you know, things are going wrong. And if I do it for maybe three minutes, five minutes a day over two week period, those things that usually bother me, literally just, I’m very calm about it, but you have to maintain it and keep doing it and getting outside, making sure that you go and do whatever it is that makes you happy is the simplest thing.
Kerry Roy : It could be classical walking. It could be psych then and taking yourself away from, from your work surroundings. And one of the things I’ve always actually done this. And I see a lot of people in the industry that they, they don’t, or they can’t. But if you do have help and you do have staff or you have a family and you have, admin work to do, or you’ve got marketing to do. I actually find that if I take myself away from the business, wherever home is, and I’ll go and sit in a cafe and I’ll go and sit in a cafe, and I’ll probably say like this morning, I’m going to crack on and do all my marketing and I’m going to, Oh, and to do something abdomen, the amount of work I can get done in a short period of time by switching my environment is phenomenal because if I’m at home or in the business, you’ve always get instructed.
Kerry Roy : You think I’ve got this to do, and you start picking them pockets in it, other things, but to take yourself to and calculate it’s nice atmosphere. Well, anyway, whatever the environment makes you feel good, you can actually get a lot of work done. I ate, well, last year there was one afternoon. I just took my phone to the beach. And I thought people might think, Oh, she’s not working lazy. I busted out or work in the afternoon. Then I probably would have been in a day of being at home. And I came away feeling good because I actually switched my environment. So it meant, and I got my work done because I was focused. I was focused and was nothing around distracts me. So that is a big, big tip. I would suggest and advise to, to anyone to just, just try it, just try it and say,
Sarah Riley : Yeah, no, not quite so easy now because of COVID and when we can, and when it’s safe, definitely get out there. And I think we’ll say that more than ever as people have been in lockdown in the same situation, or they’re working from home in the same situation, it does generate these pressures, which you can’t leave at work. You can’t walk out the door and put the, shut the door and that’s it. That’s your pressure left behind. It stays in the house. So energy stays in your home.
Kerry Roy : Exactly. And not use that. So right. When you talk about that energy is there’s no, especially now with COVID, there’s no different definition is there’s no defined and then going to work and coming back an hour and then just shutting the door and living in your home life. It’s all becoming blended. And I think that’s when we can get a bit confused, mentally, and I know a lot of my friends are working from home that normally go to the office and come back at five and just finish work. They’re working on work is the laptop there. So they’ll sit in that till seven at night now, and actually working more than, than ever before, because it’s there, the office is in their dining room or in the lounge or bedroom and that stuff that they should be asked, should they stay says, yeah, it’s hard. Isn’t it
Sarah Riley : It is really hard. But I think that you’re right, it’s about creating a routine is creating those patterns that allow us to switch off and allow us to take a break. And I love the idea about your camp fan. And I recently sold mine and I really desperately desperately miss it. And, you know, before lockdown, I sold it. And so I was thinking, Oh, thank goodness I sold it before down, but actually I really wish I had it. I had,
Kerry Roy : You should have saw it after. Is this not a problem
Sarah Riley : I know it wasn’t great. Timing me for sure. But yeah, I think it’s, yeah, we have to create that space. And, as you know, I’ve got to an emergency office in my garden, which is a caravan and old vintage caravan. And, and so that one, I’m not using it as an office. I know it’s an office space, but it’s a temporary office space. And when I’m not using it as that, and I need time to get away, I’ve got a lovely little seat, which is a way from my office desk in the caravan. And, you know, have a, a little burner, an incense stick and I’ll go out there and I’ll just sit in the window and you just sit there kind of out of the rain and as we’re in the UK and just, you know, get that real, balance of making your mind, understand that you’re switching off. I think that’s the case.
Kerry Roy : It is. And just being stamped and trying not to, not to think about the work. And I think that’s what I enjoyed about the meditation side is it actually does stop you thinking about just, just being present and it is all about just being present and then trying not to always focus on the few to say much. And I think cope is proved to resolve that you can’t always predict and focus overlay on the future. It’s good to have plans, but we can’t always control it. So being present and being present with your loved ones and your family and friends is, is the most important thing. It really is for entrepreneurs. We just can’t help, but so, yeah, it’s but, and, and, and I think in the industry, as well as, people don’t always speak about, I know it’s there. So I think it was a movie last year at Guam show, the more that he put, the more people that are coming into the industry and the more so of, you know, years ago when I opened there, wasn’t the, the showers and the network.
Kerry Roy : And obviously it’s great, but it also can have this stigmatism. I can, a big co-op industry does that. There’s a little bit of headiness them. And as I was saying that, that I don’t have this, or the down want to open up too much about the problems because they might feel like, Oh, no, because it’s, it’s almost open in the South to competition that could, you know, squash you almost. But I think it’s, it’s good that we can, we should, you know, in this kind of industry where a lot of those have got, farms, well, spaces, outdoor spaces where a lot of people, our guests comment, because it makes them feel like any stresses of a legs we should be able to, as hosts of that, of what the aspirin, we should be able to just open, like, speak and say, God, I’m really struggling in Iowa. How do you find this And what did you do and how each that help each of that with that stress and emotion. And it’d be nice if, if we can create that love and then feed them that we’re always compete.
Sarah Riley : I think so. Absolutely because there’s really enough for everybody. We don’t need to, compete or attack or, you know, be CA worried or fearful of, not being noticed in amongst the crowd. It’s, you know, it’s really important that we feel very grounded with that, that there’s room for everybody. so it’s been fantastic speaking to you, Kerry I’ve I always love talking to you. We actually talked for an hour and a half before we even,
Kerry Roy : So it’s just been a delight
Sarah Riley : And so much better than me focusing on my finances, for sure.
Kerry Roy : But now you come to the question again, we always been frustrated with those jobs that we just don’t like doing do it.
Sarah Riley : Absolutely. So my account’s day has turned into a chatting Macquarie day. I’ll tell you so much nicer
Kerry Roy : Out slope.
Sarah Riley : Thank you so much, but you know, I can’t wait to come over and see you at some point when, and I think it’s just going to be really amazing to see what you set up now, but if, and, and also to anyone listening, if you want to go back to, the original podcast for Kerry, Kerry did a, an interview with me ages ago, which was you actually starting on your journey over in Italy to now. And so there’s this huge jump between the two and now you’re all set up and it’s all, all kind of now you’re running it. And it’s amazing.
Kerry Roy : And it nearly broke me, but the kids, they didn’t come out. Right. There’s always a, there’s always a style of aligning isn’t that No, thank you. So it’s been a pleasure and I hope other people can. So, you know, anybody else, that’s sort of feeling this way that they can relate to, to what we’re saying as well. And, you know, allowing them, there’ll be afraid to speak out.
Sarah Riley : Absolutely. Yeah. Seek the help you need. Thank you, Kerry. Again, take care. See you soon. Bye. Thank you for joining me today. And thanks also to Kerry for sharing her story. If that meant something to you that touched you, then please do seek help, speak to friends, speak to a loved one. You know, you shouldn’t be doing this on your own. And if you get the help you need things will definitely look brighter. And in the meantime, if you need to draw upon my own secret golden tea, which is about to become a secret no more, then I can highly recommend this. It tastes quite unique, but it’s still amazing. And I’m going to speak to you about all the recipe and also what each element does. So first we get yourself some hot, but not boiling water in a teapot or Salzburg, or however else you, you all want to make.
Sarah Riley : It might get stained a bit because what you’re going to add to that is half a grated turmeric. If you can get a fresh one, that’s fantastic, but the powder is just as good. And then you get an inch of grated, fresh ginger, and then 10 saffron strands. And then you add some chili to taste. Now I love hot things. So I always put a lot of chili in it, but not everyone else likes that. But when you’re about to, so you let it stew for a bit. And then when you’re going to pour it into your cup, you put some lemon juice and some sweetener of your choice, either honey or maple syrup or something like that, to give it a little bit of sweetness, honey is really lovely and it works really well with this. So the reason this is so good is because the ginger actually fires off your reward center in your brain, but it also gives you an amazing flavor in it, but it gives you a spicy heat.
Sarah Riley : And again, all of this sets off the dopamine in the reward system, in your brain, and that gives you the same sense of satisfaction as eating a bar of chocolate. Then the chili does exactly the same. It helps to set off that reward system, but the chili also works with the turmeric. The turmeric is very, anti-inflammatory, it’s really good at times of stress to help the body cope and to adapt to the changes that are happening. So the chili helps the turmeric be absorbed into the body. And the Cephalon research from Australia shows us apparently acts like a mild antidepressant, but you shouldn’t take more than 10 strands a day. Then of course, there’s the lemon, which is fantastic for the gut is full of vitamin C and it helps to boost your immunity. So all of these things are fantastic. If you want to have a healthy, uplifting golden tea, to help you through those moments when you might need that extra boost. So I hope you enjoy that recipe. Do please leave a review on this podcast episode, because I’d really like to hear from you. And remember, if you are struggling, seek some help. You don’t need to do this on your own. And there’s lots of people who will be more than happy to help. So take care and hope you will join me again soon.